A word: Speechless

Really pretend to be strong now. Pretending as I dont really care. Smiling ;)

Silent when drag by problem. I am speechless.

I hope that you know what behind my smile.

But you are not.

This is the middle.

Are we going to fear it.

I am speechless now.

Totally speechless.

21.11.1957

Eid milad ummi. I miss you soooo much :)

Apa Perkembangan sekarang??

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim.

 Hmm.Feel like a long time not writing anything here. I had created a hypothesis actually. If I dont write any entry or status in fb ke, I actually dont read enough book. I mean books besides the anatomy or the chemistry book. Alhamdulillah, almost three months in Kuantan. In the garden of knowledge despite of the hestic day, I live my own life I thought. Alone. Often. In the library. Carrel room specifically. Eh, wait! ALONE? So where is Allah? No. Not alone :)

Last week, I had the chance to meet my friends in Gombak as I go to al-attas's saturday lecture. I cant describe how happy I am. Hew hew >.< That Sunday morning we gather senior & junior and taaruf. Ok. Thats the point. "Apa perkembangan sekarang" Well, my senior ada yg dah kahwin. Bro Najib. haha. And one I think getting engaged. Else, busy with architecture projects and English classes. Me? I really do lot in Kuantan I think. Knowing many new peoples. And definitely new 'head'. Perangai macam-macam. Haha. New roomates that really encourage me to get married very soon~ Perhaps they want to choose "who" for me too. Erkk.. ( I said to Mira, I dont care, whoever he is, dont approach me, approach my wali. Insyaallah i will give a minute to think.Saying is easy akteli-.-) New classmates~ Colourfull~ Owh, back to Gombak. Aina and me going out with the Gombak-ians at Wangsa Maju. I dont know. What feeling I had that time. I am happy but I felt guilty too. I dont wanna mention here.

And time to back to Kuantan come. Really going to miss them again. The ticket state the bus will depart at 8.30 pm. The only bus available that day. And guess what, sudah menyusahkan someone to "delivery free" ke Greenwood and accompanied us until 9.00 pm..Really need too akteli walaupon dah beberapa kali suruh dia pulang. Greenwood is not a best location to wait for busses at the night tau.  The bus late. Janji Melayu perhaps? Btw, Thankyou you youu. END. tak tahu nak naip ape dah~merapu je.

We only love the beginning of things. We hate the middle, and fear the end.

Rasulullah shallallahu'alaihi wa sallam bersabda:

"Sesungguhnya orang-orang yang saling mencintai, kamar-kamarnya di SYURGA nanti terlihat seperti BINTANG yang muncul dari timur atau bintang barat yang berpijar. Lalu ada yang bertanya, "siapa mereka itu?", "mereka itu adalah orang-orang yang mencintai kerana Allah 'Azzawajalla." (HR. Ahmad)

:) Strive for final exam~

Perginya seorang Ammar..

Bimillahirrahmanirrahim. In the Name of Allah The Most Gracious and The Most Merciful.

Nota yang terakhir Ammar tulis dan letak dalam begnya adalah kaedah pertama dalam risalah ikhlas, 

“Perlu ada keredhaan Allah dalam amalan kalian. Sekiranya Allah redha sedangkan seluruh dunia berpaling, maka itu tidak penting. Jika Dia menerima sedangkan seluruh masyarakat menolak maka tiada kesannya. Setelah Dia meredhai dan menerima, jika Dia kehendaki dan selari dengan hikmah-Nya, walaupun kalian dalam keadaan tidak meminta, Dia akan menjadikan masyarakat juga menerima dan meredhai. Kerana itu, keredhaan Allah sahaja yang perlu dijadikan sebagai tujuan utama dalam khidmat dakwah ini."

Satu sosok tubuh yang tak dikenali pun.

Tapi tak tahu kenapa turut rasa kehilangan. 

Kehilangan seorang pemuda.

Yang perginya diredhai ibubapanya.

Kebaikannya disebut-sebut.

Dikenang dan dirindui orang yang pernah mengenalinya.

Perginya menemui Ilahi.

Di bumi syahidnya pejuang2 islam.

Seusia diri ini.

Lantas.

Tertanya sendiri.

Bila masa nya pula diri ini??

Sungguh beza.

Aku dan dia.